Thursday, November 20, 2014

An Email to Sonje


Ya know, the first time you visited me from NY, you stayed with me overnight. It
was great. Later on, you would come, and stay with me at my moms crib.
Eventually you moved in with your Grandad, and I was over there often
as well. I grinded hard as hell to have enough money just so I could travel to
see you, and make sure I could take you out and show you a good time.
I stayed with you at a den at your friends house, we rented a basement together, and then, an apartment. We've been consumed by eachother for so long...

....I made an analogy about you being an extra limb tahat weighs me
down. Fast forward about week, I'm able to describe you more
accurately. Your more like a kidney-because much like a kidney, the
effects of only having one are not necessarily seen in the short term.
If you're suprised at the person I've been behaving like as of late,
then that makes 2 of us. However, you've been very intrinsic to my
life for quite some time, and not even I could anticipate what its
like to not have you around.

Anyway, that was just something I wanted to say. I emailed because it
allowed me to produce my thoughts fluidly and coherently without
getting too emotional. Short story before I finish tho...

...I was with Quinton one day this summer, I had my red bandana in my
right pocket, anxious to tell people about the story of the Bloods who
backed down the looters in Ferguson. I ran into a young lady at the
DTLR, she commented about it. I gladly told her my story.
She gave me the "that sounds great, but I'm either too uninteresed or
too stupid to acknowledge." face. She hardly even knew what was going
on in Ferguson. Basically, she was just flirting. I came home and was
so happy that the girl I laid next to understood the gravity of such
an occurance. You being an "intrinsic" part of my life was good and
bad. Good because I liked being around you (I know,it wasn't like that
ALL of the time) but it was also bad, because I took it for granted.

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