Wednesday, March 11, 2009

A Small Deviation from Protocol

I'm referring to this as a "deviation" because this particular lesson isn't worthless at all. Its something that I've learned recently, about 11 days ago actually. It dawned on me that I've spent the greater half of the last 7 months or so conflicting with her, rather than appreciating her. Sometimes she would "over react" to things I felt were trivial. but, all she would ever ask for was help - help with the kids, help with keeping the house - small things. I would rather focus on what I deemed important, which mainly came in the form of financial assistance.

I was way too stubborn to even entertain the idea that my own train of thought was anything less than the gospel - unwilling to bend and meet halfway. There were quite few nights where she would lay in bed staring at the back of my head while I sat holding a controller/remote/or keyboard. I imagine a small amount of my attention just before she went to sleep would have sufficed - BUT - Before I completely villainize myself, I feel that I must at least mention that opposing party wasn't exactly the most compromising either, but I digress...

Rather than celebrating our relationship, a lot of time was spent with petty bickering. I could have told her how much I admire her courage, tenacity, and unwavering loyalty toward me, and her family. I got comfortable, and took for granted what I believed would always be waiting for me.

and now its too late.

May She Always R.I.P.
Mia Ann Marie Winstead
January 2, 1977 - February 28, 2009

We'll kick it again someday.